I read somewhere that 95% of the stuff you worry about never happens and the other 5% you couldn’t have done anything about anyway. The more I go through crazy times in my life, the more this little adage rings true.
I used to worry a lot. I still worry . . . a lot, but I’m learning how to manage it all a bit better. Some things that have helped me are therapy, reading books, mindful meditation and awareness of the present moment (essentially, Buddhist practices), yoga, walking with good friends, tea, and my family. Speaking of my family, my mother told me something that has also really helped me. She said that I should only focus my energy on a problem for about a half an hour at a time. Then just move on (I tend to obsess) and come back to it the next day or later if I have to. Do something different–if it is a problem that doesn’t have an immediate solution e.g., money, a break-up, a misunderstanding . . . then just let it be for awhile.
Holy crap, this works. It’s sometimes hard to literally get up and just go read a book, or go to the park for a walk, or call a friend to meet for tea, but once you’re there, you feel better.
I’m also just going to list some things that have not helped me (they are a little obvious, but so easy to fall prey to). . . drugs, alcohol, idiotic men, ranting on social media, and more worrying which just leads to the proverbial feeling sorry for myself route. Sometimes it’s OK to feel sorry for yourself. It can be cathartic. You just don’t really want to take up residence in Pity Party Town. Folks will stop visiting (or stop reading your blog).
Anyway, I’m not gonna sugar coat it–most of the time, life is hard. So instead of trying to self-medicate shit away, it’s just easier to FREAK THE HELL OUT for about a half an hour (set an egg timer if you have to. ha!) and then chill ’cause most of it ain’t even gonna happen anyway and the other . . . well, you can’t stop it, so you might as well just roll with it.
Also, always remember two things:
1. No one can take away your birthday. For real. And . . .
2. Are you still breathing? Yup. Things are gonna be just fine.